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Coping With Your Grief

The physical and emotional reactions following the death of your baby can be overwhelming and intense.  Many of you may feel lost and alone and are unsure of how to cope with such intense pain.  Although there is no way to completely alleviate the pain you are feeling, there are things you can do to help yourself through this intense grieving process.


  • Communicate your feelings to your partner, family members, friends, clergy, counselor, or in a support group.  Allowing yourself to express your feelings regarding the death of your baby is an important part of grieving and can provide you with a necessary release of bottled up emotions.


  • Be sure to eat a balanced diet and drink plenty of fluids.  Grieving is also physical and it is important for your body to have the fuel it needs to work through the grief.  Avoid fast foods and “junk” foods.  Also avoid caffeinated and alcoholic beverages.  


  • Avoid tobacco products.


  • Follow the instructions provided to you by your health care professional regarding the physical care of your body.


  • Participate in some form of exercise.  Even a 10 minute daily walk can be helpful. 


  • Allow yourself to get adequate rest.


  • Attend a support group if there is one in your area.


  • Read books related to pregnancy and infant loss.  This can provide you with an opportunity to gain an understanding of what you are experiencing.


  • Seek professional counselling if necessary.


  • Allow family members and friends to help out with household chores such as laundry, cooking, cleaning, yard work, and childcare.


  • If struggling with faith issues talk to a spiritual leader in your community.


  • Keep a journal of your thoughts and feelings.


  • Write a letter to your baby

  • Create a memorial item for your baby.


  • Do not put away or give away baby items until you feel you are ready.


  • Avoid making big decisions if at all possible.


  • Avoid complete isolation.


  • Allow yourself the time needed to heal both physically and emotionally. 


  • The grieving process is a journey and takes time.  Do not rush yourself or allow others to make you feel you should be “over it” by now.



"He that conceals his grief finds no remedy for it."

-Turkish Proverb

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